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View Full Version : This is satirical right? Right?



Ferre
17-10-2010, 03:30 PM
Seriously, this must be satirical, but I'm not 100% sure, is it?

The Art of Manliness | Mens Interests and Lifestyle (http://artofmanliness.com/)

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pctec
17-10-2010, 03:44 PM
Somehow I dont think so (http://www.amazon.com/Art-Manliness-Classic-Skills-Manners/dp/1600614620/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1287348175&sr=8-1)...

Ferre
17-10-2010, 03:46 PM
If that's not satirical, then it's pretty sad. :sqlaugh:

pctec
17-10-2010, 03:53 PM
Indeed... weird how some people need a manual for something so basic... like being a man :sqconfused:

Atom
17-10-2010, 04:24 PM
If that's not satirical, then it's pretty sad. :sqlaugh:It's only satirical in part, check out a few of the articles. I just read the one on survival and edible/non-edible plants, it appears to be legit.

Muddy
17-10-2010, 04:25 PM
Yeah, I think they're serious.

Muddy
17-10-2010, 04:27 PM
At least he said each section is crammed with tits.

Muddy
17-10-2010, 04:43 PM
4Aj55sgudlc

ewomack
17-10-2010, 07:36 PM
Why does the new technology (blogs) get so excited when it converts to old technology (books)?!??!

Muddy
17-10-2010, 08:05 PM
Probably has something to do with the resurgence of vinyl.

julien_simon
17-10-2010, 08:10 PM
Probably has something to do with the resurgence of vinyl.

don't forget neon.

Muddy
17-10-2010, 08:14 PM
Well, everybody tells me to stay away from Joomla. But then there's some people that say it's great.

ewomack
17-10-2010, 08:21 PM
I hear the same thing about Joomla. Does it really suck?

Muddy
17-10-2010, 08:24 PM
I heard it gets hacked easily.

Strong
18-10-2010, 12:43 PM
Why does the new technology (blogs) get so excited when it converts to old technology (books)?!??!

'Cause it is seen as The Transition from faffing about on the internet to Meaningful Writing where real kudos is mysteriously inserted and shines out of the writer's anus from there on in. After all they are a real Published Author then, with a real ISBN number that girls can look up and get wet about in the genital areas late at night in their beds while they ponder the writer's chat up lines. Saying you write a blog doesn't have the same panty dampening effect yet.

Everything is about sex and relationships in the end.

ewomack
18-10-2010, 05:32 PM
Everything is about sex and relationships in the end.

STOP HITTING ON ME!!!!

Muddy
18-10-2010, 08:57 PM
Everything is about sex and relationships in the end.

In the end?

Atom
18-10-2010, 09:02 PM
Everything is about hedonism in the end.

Strong
19-10-2010, 05:47 AM
I wasn't alluding to anal sex! If I meant rectal probing I would have said so in no uncertain words. But that was funny, if unintentional :sqbiggrin:

Strong
19-10-2010, 05:49 AM
I'll rephrase if I may;

In the end, everything is about anal sex and relationships.

Zap
19-10-2010, 07:23 AM
I'll rephrase if I may;

In the end, everything is about anal sex and relationships.

Still snickering wildly over here.

Atom
19-10-2010, 09:43 AM
If in the end the love I take is equal to the love I make then that is not a hell of a lot of incentive for love making, now is it? lol

Muddy
19-10-2010, 10:15 AM
If in the end the love I take is equal to the love I make then that is not a hell of a lot of incentive for love making, now is it? lol

Doesn't matter if you're the Walrus.

Atom
19-10-2010, 10:19 AM
Doesn't matter if you're the Walrus.I beg your pardon, five foot eleven and a hundred fifty three pounds and proud of it. Hell, I don't even own a treadmill! lol

Muddy
19-10-2010, 10:22 AM
I beg your pardon...

You never promised me a rose garden?

Atom
19-10-2010, 10:30 AM
You never promised me a rose garden?Speaking of which, I like the song Queen of Hearts by Juice Newton. Now all y'all have to do is figure out to which which I am referring.

Atom
19-10-2010, 10:34 AM
I heavily considered to what which, but decided on which which due to the repetivity. (yes, that last word is an Atomism)

Atom
19-10-2010, 10:44 AM
I just heard on the news that someone fired shots at the pentagon lol! Doh!

Honey I'm going out target practicing for a bit, brb lol.

Strong
19-10-2010, 12:42 PM
If in the end the love I take is equal to the love I make then that is not a hell of a lot of incentive for love making, now is it? lol

Give and take, you seem to have the basic ins and outs sorted quite clearly. Some acts are justified in and of themselves, no further incentive is required. Sexual congress is. Fun for fun's sake, nothing further is required, apart from marmalade and chocolate sauce, but that's for advanced give and take.

Honey, please bring the honey with you!

Not again dear :sqembarrassed:

Atom
19-10-2010, 12:48 PM
Give and take, you seem to have the basic ins and outs sorted quite clearly. Some acts are justified in and of themselves, no further incentive is required. Sexual congress is. Fun for fun's sake, nothing further is required, apart from marmalade and chocolate sauce, but that's for advanced give and take.

Honey, please bring the honey with you!

Not again dear :sqembarrassed:Please tell me that we are not still talking about anal intercourse. lol

Strong
19-10-2010, 12:50 PM
What you do in the privacy of your own bedroom is none of my concern, but in general I thought we had moved a little further forward than that particular orifice.

Atom
19-10-2010, 12:54 PM
Found a new anal lube, honey, it's honey.

Get away from me with that stuff Harrold, I mean it this time.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:01 PM
I just did something rather novel, I gave myself a haircut. It came out horribly but it's only my second time, I think I'm getting better at it. It's not a very easy task though, I'm finding.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:12 PM
Quite honestly, I didn't look at the back using two mirrors because I'm afraid, I can only imagine that everything looks just fine back there. lol

I remember my first try a while back, I could tell just by the look on my neighbor's face when I asked him how I did and he said not too bad, that weird smile I think was a dead giveaway.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:21 PM
Actually, the front looks fine, but by the look on his face I'm sure the back was at least the next best thing to a kick me note taped to my back.

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:22 PM
Have him take a picture.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:25 PM
No, you have enough fun at my expense as it is. lol

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:30 PM
I promise I won't Photoshop it with a lawnmower on the back of your head. Honest.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:32 PM
No mention of the weed trimmer, of course not, well you can just forget it.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:34 PM
BTW this whole hair cutting story is true, so go ahead, get it all out of your systems.

lol FG and the guy's last name right? I can't remember exactly what it was.. peckerweed or something lol

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:37 PM
I know! With your hair on fire! Ala Michael Jackson or Richard Pryor.

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:38 PM
Meg's boss at the walmart, that's who it was.

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:39 PM
A-8C1PEo9FQ

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:39 PM
gZJ5DIkPy9w

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:40 PM
She was supposed to fire Peter but ended up quitting. Peter says hey, is your name really so and so? I can't remember the boss's name though lol.

Muddy
19-10-2010, 01:42 PM
lich59xsjik

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:53 PM
I just used some garden scissors. I basically just hacked off what I could see from the front and what I could feel in the back, I was serious about being afraid to look at it lol!

Atom
19-10-2010, 01:55 PM
If I could see the back I would try to fix it and likely end up making it worse lol.

Atom
19-10-2010, 02:10 PM
I have this ominous feeling I'm supposed to be doing something today, damned if I can think of what. Maybe I'll stare at the calendar a while and it'll come to me.

Atom
19-10-2010, 02:17 PM
Ok I got distracted but I did manage to devise an algorithm for passing judgment on members by their Thanks ratios.

Ok j/k but the calendar has not helped one bit.. still thinking..

Atom
19-10-2010, 02:22 PM
Huh, I just thought of approximately a dozen things, that's way too many, to hell with them all I say.

Atom
19-10-2010, 03:00 PM
I see absolutely nothing wrong altered minds as the new name for this forum, please secure asap, cost no object.

Atom
19-10-2010, 03:11 PM
We'll make sure it's a nice smooth transition, no matter what kind of site it used to be. lol

Muddy
19-10-2010, 03:45 PM
What I like to do is start with Atom's most recent post and then read them all in reverse chronological order.

Atom
19-10-2010, 03:49 PM
I'll need to try that sometime, maybe in the afterlife lol.

Atom
19-10-2010, 03:51 PM
Maybe that's what hell is, having to read your own posts. lol

Atom
19-10-2010, 04:01 PM
Wait.. that would mean that most of y'all are all in hell, strike that lol.

Atom
19-10-2010, 04:03 PM
I say most because I assume there's one or possibly two that are not crazy enough to actually read all this mess. lol

Atom
19-10-2010, 04:25 PM
I probably should have done something today, but it's just not one of those prioritizing days apparently.

Zap
20-10-2010, 07:16 AM
Doesn't matter if you're the Walrus.

What if you're the eggman?

Ferre
20-10-2010, 07:24 AM
Goo goo g'joob. :)

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:51 AM
Gesundheit.

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:00 AM
I'm an affect of modern society, nothing more.

Bless you.

Thanks.

Y/W.

Get a job.

Get a haircut.

Get screwed.

Get bent.

Ok I quit.

Me too.

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:14 AM
BTW and before it escapes me, this (http://www.btwimho.com/showthread.php?t=3383) girl's hair is what the back of my head looks like. I broke down and decided to take a look last night.

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:31 AM
I'm currently involved in multiple furious attempts to not try and fix it.

Zap
20-10-2010, 08:43 AM
Just shave your head. It's very liberating. No muss. No fuss.

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:53 AM
I've been rebelling against shaved heads ever since I was a kid, even well before The Beatles. I used to dread summer's arrival. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:54 AM
I still hate the sound of an electric shaver to this day. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 08:55 AM
Dude I'm a hippie, that's like the total opposite of a shaved head kinda guy. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 09:02 AM
Though I probably should say was a hippie, it's just some kinda punky looking mess at the moment. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 09:14 AM
I've been taking swipes at it with the scissors from time to time as I pass by the mirror in vein attempts to "touch it up". lol

Muddy
20-10-2010, 09:32 AM
I've been taking swipes at it with the scissors from time to time as I pass by the mirror in vein attempts to "touch it up". lol

Maybe you should try for an artery.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:03 AM
I've just returned from cleaning up yet more black walnuts, about 10 gallons worth. It's probably a shame that I don't eat them but their meat is hell to get at.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:05 AM
Maybe you should try for an artery.That one deserves two Thanks I think. lol!

It says I have to spread more rep around first though.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:27 AM
The system is forcing me to make a decision as to Thank now and not Rep later as posts that have been Thanked first cannot be Reped after, or not Thank now and Rep or Rep and Thank later, and all because of my insufficiency at spreading Rep, well I just think it's ri with a capital r diculous and I'll simply not have it do you hear?

I've got to check the eave troughs, they're probably full of pine needles and such again already. I just cleaned the damned things out the other day it seems.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:31 AM
I should have went with Zap's netting suggestion from days of old but every time I have a few dollars it doesn't cross my mind to order some up. I suppose I'll need to write myself a note that I can ignore as I know it will require considerable effort as well to which I am not looking forward.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:38 AM
I believe I will deem it a protection mechanism for myself getting enough exercise. Yes, that's it. I just knew I'd think of something brilliant.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:43 AM
I did get dizzy a few times up there the other day though, but that doesn't really bother me too much usually, I'm kind of used to it.

Um.. hello, how come the sky is where the building wall should be? lol

Zap
20-10-2010, 10:52 AM
I should have went with Zap's netting suggestion from days of old but every time I have a few dollars it doesn't cross my mind to order some up. I suppose I'll need to write myself a note that I can ignore as I know it will require considerable effort as well to which I am not looking forward.

It's more like a hard sponge, from what I've seen.
It fits into the eaves trough, allowing water to pass through it, but nothing else.
Pretty smart idea, actually.

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:55 AM
The system is forcing me to make a decision as to Thank now and not Rep later as posts that have been Thanked first cannot be Reped after, or not Thank now and Rep or Rep and Thank later, and all because of my insufficiency at spreading Rep, well I just think it's ri with a capital r diculous and I'll simply not have it do you hear?

I've got to check the eave troughs, they're probably full of pine needles and such again already. I just cleaned the damned things out the other day it seems.Seems I've left out an or Thank, so I'd like at this opportunity to take this time to correct the error of my ways; or not Thank now and Rep or Rep and Thank or Thank later.

Thank you.

Yours truly, Jet

Atom
20-10-2010, 10:59 AM
It's more like a hard sponge, from what I've seen.
It fits into the eaves trough, allowing water to pass through it, but nothing else.
Pretty smart idea, actually.Yes, that's right too, and I somehow wandered into a netting method somewhere from there because the netting was cheaper, I think I remember now.

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:06 AM
That post #80 is quite a work of art ain't it? I'm sure there's supposed to be a lot more commas and a lot less or's but what kinda fun is that?

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:08 AM
All that I remember about grammar class is that it seemed very stupid. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:25 AM
In fact, and in all seriousness, I do not know if there is supposed to be an apostrophe in or's or not (see post #82). Please help. Thanks in advance.

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:38 AM
Certain things just absolutely refuse to stick in my brain, and others that refuse to leave shouldn't be there.

Now, about that word others in the above sentence, I'm only guessing that an apostrophe does not belong there. Please help. Thanks.

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:42 AM
I'd about liked to've killed that teacher, say nothing about paying any sort of attention in the damned class. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:45 AM
P.S.

The grammar of the above slang is perfectly correct. That, I know. lol

Atom
20-10-2010, 11:48 AM
Yes I'm sure technically there's supposed to be an h in that to've but I DON'T CARE!
Thanks and I'll see y'all on the flipside.

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:01 PM
I've always wanted to be something in life, maybe I can be the first person to have been driven insane by punctuation, now if I could just figure out a way to prove it...

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:08 PM
Ok who wants to begin typing their posts in Morse code, please raise your hands.

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:17 PM
Well I don't see any hands, thank god, I didn't like that idea either. Ok how about we invent our own forum language using all but the letter keys, anyone?

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:18 PM
Alrighty then, time for a smoke.

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:28 PM
Zap, feel free to link to this thread in the Quality Posts topic over at the big v if you wish, I'll not take exception nor confound the grave in which your first ancestor lies, I promise.

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:40 PM
Jeez Wednesday already, where does the time go? I've thoughts of derelict duties prancing in my head, I'm pretty sure I should be doing laundry or something.

Atom
20-10-2010, 12:55 PM
I'll need some human contact soon, I just had a conversation with the washing machine.

Atom
20-10-2010, 01:06 PM
Oh fer cryin' out..

it says hi. I told it I didn't want to but it insisted, so, Kenmore says hi everybody.

Atom
20-10-2010, 01:09 PM
It also insisted on a waving smiley but I simply flat out refused and might add that it's lucky it got what it did, in fact I think I will, it's lucky it got what it did.

Atom
20-10-2010, 01:16 PM
This is satirical right?

Um.. I don't think so, this is the real thing, unedited, uncensored, real life as it unfolds, true grit, most people wouldn't know a quality post if it bit them right in the ass.

Atom
20-10-2010, 01:17 PM
Wait a minute, I'm even starting to confuse my own self now, let it be stricken from the record.

Atom
20-10-2010, 01:27 PM
That's the problem with having all these great thoughts, they get a little confused sometimes. What possessed me to post the thread title is beyond even my wildest imagination, except maybe that it's related to something we are apparently supposed to remember and still be talking about, neither of which is the case in my case, I mean, I can't even remember what the OP was about, honestly. I'd look but somehow I think it's already been covered. Deeper meaning? Nope, just the straight-out dope here, one may read into it what one will, but one must be stealthy of mind and crunchy of heart to do so I strongly suspect.

Atom
20-10-2010, 03:07 PM
Jeezus I think I've been confusing threads here today but that's nothing new, anyway..
would you mind getting the clothes from the line honey? I am making supper.

You know damn well this is my Gunsmoke time Mildred, please cut the comedy.

But honey it's going to rain, I'm up to my armpits in bread dough.

Millie I'm turning the volume up, I can't hear you, one minute twenty nine seconds to Wapner.

Atom
20-10-2010, 03:30 PM
Ok apparently I have in fact not been confusing threads, however, I cannot say with any appreciable degree of certainty that they have not been confusing me.

Atom
20-10-2010, 03:53 PM
Ok I've got the laundry honey can you turn the hamburgers please?

Um.. no. Please remove yourself from my back. You know full well that I, being of sound mind but frail of stature am able to perform only mental tasks and that I do not under any circumstances like to miss the commercials, now leave please me alone. In other words, please leave me alone. And in yet other words, leave alone me please, shall I go on?

Honey do you want Graham crackers on your jello?

Dear, please!

Atom
20-10-2010, 04:02 PM
Jeezus, I'm glad I only have to type this stuff and not read it too.

Atom
20-10-2010, 04:13 PM
Incidentally, I think it's an absolute disgrace to the English language that read and read can be read differently.

Atom
20-10-2010, 04:27 PM
It should be I red a book, or I like to reed, or hello Read how are you today.

Atom
20-10-2010, 04:32 PM
Anyone that can't tell the reeds from the lemon grass, well, I just don't know what to tell ya, and the color, we can call that rhed.

Atom
20-10-2010, 05:42 PM
Welp, guess I should get out and soak up some fresh air before it gets dark, anyone want to add anything before I get back?

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:08 PM
Very well then, watch your Captain Kangaroo and your evening news, see if I care, The brain shall seep down through the nasal cavity and out the nose whilst your flesh shall wither on the bone right next to your Stairmasters and Bowflexes, and where will you be then?

I'm thinking of posting only one post per week on Saturdays, I can call it The Saturday Evening Post and it will be roughly 10 pages long of nothing but pure quality and ripe goodness.

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:16 PM
Worms shall devour thy flesh I telz ye, and vodka flavored vomit will rain down from heaven onto the cranial areas of your beloved soul-less bodies.

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:21 PM
Maybe y'all will get lucky and a PBS documentary will sweep me away from this horrid and ghastly machine of the devil and his wicked polar elves.

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:25 PM
I'd like to now talk a little bit about acid indigestion, I just hate it when my acid doesn't digest don't you?

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:29 PM
Next subject, nail clippers. Ingenious design. The poor bastard that invented them probably died a miserable jalapeno popper.

Atom
20-10-2010, 07:36 PM
Ok starting to get a little punchy now, where the heck is that TV Guide..