View Full Version : Advice to Live By
Strong
15-09-2009, 07:44 AM
This cheered me up no end, Advice to live by (http://www.wimp.com/liveadvice/).
Have you got any advice you would like to pass on to others?
Great thread idea, Strongy!
Here are a few...
1. Don't take candy from strangers! (Unless it's a she and she's hot!)
2. Don't dip your pen in the company ink! (Unless your pen is really, really dry!)
3. Never look a gift horse in the mouth. (Everyone knows the legs go first.)
4. When life hands you lemons, make lemonade. (If you're really lucky, you might make back enough to pay for the lemons.)
5. All work and no play, makes Jack a dull boy. (And running up the hill with Jill is a great way to play!)
Strong
15-09-2009, 01:03 PM
Number 4 is deep, and tangy too!
Muddy
15-09-2009, 01:30 PM
Don't take candy from strangers!
http://www.btwimho.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=204&stc=1&d=1253035829
(...)Have you got any advice you would like to pass on to others?Yes, never watch two episodes of Martha's Sewing Room in succession.
Strong
15-09-2009, 04:31 PM
I used to be hooked on that Yankee Workshop, that dude had a free reign with my mind for far too long. It was only his flag pole that finally allowed me to switch off guilt free.
Muddy
15-09-2009, 04:32 PM
That would switch me off too.
Strong
15-09-2009, 04:36 PM
It was twenty foot high and tapered. He installed it at the front of his property. Even did the wiring and raised the flag.
I couldn't be bothered after that show.
Norm is a good woodworker, but he is a nut case. He once said that if anyone put a drink on his table saw that they would be severely reprimanded. True story. lol
Strong
15-09-2009, 05:16 PM
Norm! That's it. I wasn't sure of his name its been so long. Damn those checked shirts still have a fascination.
He sure did have a lot of stuff in that industrial sized workshop of his. But you are right, he could turn a piece of wood into a thing of beauty. I'll give him that!
Norm! That's it. I wasn't sure of his name its been so long. Damn those checked shirts still have a fascination.
He sure did have a lot of stuff in that industrial sized workshop of his. But you are right, he could turn a piece of wood into a thing of beauty. I'll give him that!Actually, Norm hosts The New Yankee Workshop, The Yankee Workshop was hosted by some purist that did everything by hand or foot. True story. lol
Guess how he turned a spindle out? Rope and a foot pedal I kid you not. lol
Course Norm, he spends hours cleaning and waxing his table saw surface so I'm not surprised about the possible hemorrhoid a cup of coffee could cause. lol
ewomack
15-09-2009, 08:57 PM
Never eat anything that someone hands you while saying "eat this." You will learn the hard way.
Strong
16-09-2009, 05:31 AM
And closely tired in with the 'eat this' warning should be the 'smell this' warning.
Looks like someone is tired. Get some sleep, Strongy.
ewomack
16-09-2009, 01:30 PM
I used to do "smell this" to people so I know your advice should be well heeded, Strong...
One thing I've done my entire life is smell everything. I won a neighborhood food IDing game once where the participants were blindfolded, I was quite proud of that, the spectators were in shock.
I have recently been uder the impression that it quite possibly could be my canine ancestry that is responsible.
I think that there should be a spirit named Charlie Darwin's Absolute Absinthe.
Strong
16-09-2009, 01:41 PM
Sorry Atom, of course I meant tied.
I cannot for the life of me understand why there isn't.
Sorry Atom, of course I meant tied.You are forgiven, now get to bed.
ewomack
16-09-2009, 01:42 PM
Hmmm... the nearest I could find was Darwin martketing (http://www.darwinmarketing.com/en/index.html?_sv_code=1_690371_112028586&gclid=CIiT4cbW9pwCFRINDQodD3rfaQ)... they must only market the products fittest for survival... like the 8-track...
julien_simon
16-09-2009, 01:42 PM
don't throw up on your server
ewomack
16-09-2009, 01:43 PM
But what if it smells bad?
You are forgiven, now get to bed.
That or shoot some meth, one or the other.
Muddy
16-09-2009, 08:40 PM
Learn about Mary Schmich (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Schmich).
ewomack
16-09-2009, 10:09 PM
http://www.freefoto.com/images/01/08/01_08_52---Duck_web.jpg
ewomack
16-09-2009, 10:09 PM
http://images.replacements.com/images/images5/crystal/H/heisey_lariat_blown_cheese_cover_lid_only_P0000036 982S0091T2.jpg
C0K_LZDXp0I
Check out from 6:11.
Forget being a gentleman. Get the FUCK outta my way! :sqlaugh:
Check out from 6:11.
Forget being a gentleman. Get the FUCK outta my way! :sqlaugh:I noticed that. Looks like he's wanting to use her for extra cover as well. LOL
That film is a testament to the pure ignorance of the US government at that time. As if people weren't going to eventually find out how dangerous nukes really were. A single bomb at that time could have exterminated all the inhabitants of NYC. They're of course even more powerful today. I sometimes wonder if the common people of some countries even today understand how dangerous they are.
Surely the gov could not have been trying to divert any kind of panic either, I mean, what were people going to do if told the truth, be jumping out of 10 story buildings left and right? lol. I honestly think it was a simple case of the gov showing their dumber than the average bear side.
Muddy
17-09-2009, 01:46 AM
Seems like it was an attempt to assuage fear...give a sense of hope where there really is no hope. In other words, yes there is this terrible destructive force that has been created and now you all know about it. But don't panic and stop spending money because look! It can be survived!
Ahhh yes, the old assuage fear with outright deception trick, beauty.
Muddy
17-09-2009, 01:58 AM
Yeah, that's the guv'ment for ya.
Muddy
17-09-2009, 02:00 AM
Hey, I just noticed...you shot Kennedy!
Yes, and I'm wearing my favorite assassination Santa hat.
It was only due to growing discontent among the scientific community of the day with gov agencies designating fallout shelters and putting out films like Duck And Cover that people were eventually told the truth.
Also due to activists like Dorothy Day..
"Dorothy Day led volunteers in scores of marches and got arrested four times from 1955 to 1959 for civil disobedience, including refusal to take shelter during a civil defense drill for a mock nuclear attack on New York City."
Muddy
17-09-2009, 03:12 AM
I had no idea there was so much available on Hulu (http://www.btwimho.com/showpost.php?p=8456&postcount=24)!
I haven't seen that episode, I'll have to check it out.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 06:35 AM
Hulu is only available from the united states....:sqfrown:
ewomack
17-09-2009, 10:47 AM
Damn this segmented internet!!!
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 10:49 AM
I feel prosecuted but the internet as well.
I wrote to the head office of the internet to complain and never got an answer.
I feel prosecuted but the internet as well.
I wrote to the head office of the internet to complain and never got an answer.
Ya gotta go straight to the top. Write to Al Gore. He invented the internet.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 10:54 AM
Dr. Mr Gore.
My internet is slow. Please fix it.
Cordially,
Julien
Muddy
17-09-2009, 10:55 AM
Please send Tipper right away!
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 06:26 PM
where the heck is everybody?
you guys are gone in the morning, away at night and absent in between.
I can't rant forever because I WILL sober up one day.
*idea*
Garcon, another bottle please. With a straw.
Garcon with the hard c and the short o is the only one I know, and that means something that I'm not at liberty to divulge until I reach the age of anti-puberty.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 06:37 PM
thank you for being awake.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 06:37 PM
and for saying something kinda related to my post.
It means a lot to me.
Jeezus, I've been responding to your posts for the last half hour, you're just too fast.
I have a fly to kill. Don't tell Strongy. That poor bastard is starting to get on my nerves. Hopefully hell does not exist.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 06:47 PM
I've also just launched skype, hoping somebody to bug will be online...
hope is all I have left.
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 08:41 PM
Advice to live by. [VIDEO] (http://www.wimp.com/liveadvice/)
Muddy
17-09-2009, 08:44 PM
Advice to live by. [VIDEO] (http://www.wimp.com/liveadvice/)
You must have liked post 1 pretty good eh?
julien_simon
17-09-2009, 08:46 PM
LOL
I believe I came to this thread half way through and didn't bother reading the first couple of pages.
Please don't ban me
Strong
17-05-2010, 05:20 PM
When your six year old son tells you that when he dies he'll go to heaven to be with you, don't contradict him by saying that although he might be there, that you are unlikely to because you don't believe in heaven. Tears and heart break will ensue.
Muddy
18-05-2010, 11:10 AM
:sqfrown:
Tears and heart break will ensue.
I guess I took a cue from your playbook without realizing it.
My daughter ended up in tears last night when the topic of what to do with my mother's ashes came up.
I thought it might be nice to take them to her home town (Population Today = 800) where she grew up and spread them there.
My daughter doesn't like that idea as we would no longer have possession of them and she fears her memories of her grandma will disappear along with the ashes.
Almost brought me to tears trying to explain it.
Strong
18-05-2010, 01:01 PM
Perhaps sitting down and looking at a few family photos/videos with her might be a subtle way to show her that there are good ways to remember her grandma. Talking about the good times will also help, as will discussing where your mother was born and some of her early life. Discussions of this nature are a difficult thing for little ones to understand, take it slow.
That's my thinking, but after yesterday (see my previous post) I wouldn't trust anything I say if I were you.
Strong
15-11-2011, 12:11 PM
Mohandas Fucking Gandhi is the new Jesus Christ. Try it, it feels right in the mouth.
For instance, you are walking down the stairs and fouth step from the bottom you step on a careless, cream filled chocolate eclair, you end up doing a double salchow with a 60 degree twist but manage to land it with only a slight muscle strain, say it with me,
"Mohandas Fucking Gandhi, who left that eclair there".
I know it is a bigger mouth full, but surely it's more fullfilling then that eclair!?!
Strong
15-11-2011, 12:12 PM
Now my arse is hurting so I'm off to stretch my legs, I may be some time.
Jesus I am completely lost now, not even sure how I got in here..
anyway..
don't eat frozen pizza.
And check the date on that mayonnaise.
ewomack
15-11-2011, 01:56 PM
Yes, because mayonnaise ages like wine. Don't throw away that vintage goo.
I sometimes used to eat a loose shred of cheese or two before baking, then one day I noticed the warning, fallen shreds get promptly binned now.
I did actually eat a frozen pizza one time. I don't exactly recall the circumstances but I'm sure they were grim.
Very grim indeed. I've been to the very bottom, I seen some things, man, and some stuff.
Greasy kitchen cabinets, toothpaste stuck to the ceiling, oh yeah, I been there.
Muddy
15-11-2011, 10:10 PM
Greasy kitchen cabinets...
In need of a good shellacking.
In need of a good shellacking.That's right. They say to clean the grease first, but I enjoy the rich patina.
Ah.. might wanna watch that canned foods intake, they say the cans are lined inside with BHA.
Levels of BHA will be substantially reduced by removing contents prior to consumption.
No but seriously, a can of Campbell's soup a day for 5 days yielded a tenfold increase in BHA levels as compared to homemade.
So everyone get out that Ginsu and get chopping.
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