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  1. Replies
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    I got up at 2:30 this morning in time to catch 77...

    I got up at 2:30 this morning in time to catch 77 Sunset Strip, then Night Gallery. I just got through two episodes of The Facts Of Life and am now watching an episode of Different Strokes. The...
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    I like my eggs benedict arnold.

    I like my eggs benedict arnold.
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    My pappy done told me once he said son, don't...

    My pappy done told me once he said son, don't ever step on no ants ifn you can help it. Fuck the horses, they don't know any better.
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    For example; hold your taters. Now if you'll...

    For example; hold your taters. Now if you'll excuse me I'm fixin to shoot me some dinner.
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    Festus is a whole show in itself. He has some...

    Festus is a whole show in itself. He has some really great lines.
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    Each episode of Gunsmoke begins with Matt Dillon...

    Each episode of Gunsmoke begins with Matt Dillon shooting someone in a shoot out. I'm not really sure that's such a good idea.
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    To get MeTV free like I do, you'd have to be...

    To get MeTV free like I do, you'd have to be within 70 miles or so of a transponder that broadcasts it and have an antenna which costs about 60 bucks.
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    I've been toying with the idea of becoming a...

    I've been toying with the idea of becoming a vacuum cleaner salesman.
  9. Replies
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    I don't deserve to be alive, I've done nothing to...

    I don't deserve to be alive, I've done nothing to procreate the species.
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    I'll only let a woman make a fool out of me once,...

    I'll only let a woman make a fool out of me once, after that I can do it myself.
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    I was young once, but I did not grow up and have...

    I was young once, but I did not grow up and have a station wagon full of kids like my parents did. Quite the opposite in fact.
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    one two three.

    one two three.
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    Well that's better then.

    Well that's better then.
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    I'll have you know my great grandmother's great...

    I'll have you know my great grandmother's great grandmother was a nurse.

    Oh. Ok, sorry, dude.
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    Kinda.

    Kinda.
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    Dude. Are you fucking crazy?

    Dude. Are you fucking crazy?
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    I gotta nip this rotten apple in the butt.

    I gotta nip this rotten apple in the butt.
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    Evidence is one thing, but innuendo is another.

    Evidence is one thing, but innuendo is another.
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    Please visit my sig link, there's a variety of...

    Please visit my sig link, there's a variety of sizes and styles for everyone.
  20. Replies
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    Tell the truth.

    Tell the truth.
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    Has anyone here ever tried crocheting spaghetti?

    Has anyone here ever tried crocheting spaghetti?
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    Ah, ok. Sorry, dude.

    Ah, ok. Sorry, dude.
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    Listen... I have children to rear, don't bother...

    Listen... I have children to rear, don't bother me.
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    Apparently we live in a world where it is felt...

    Apparently we live in a world where it is felt necessary to have TV commercials solely to ask people not to pet service dogs. What the fuck, dude. Just leave the fucking things alone.
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    I'm sorry, but I just don't want to live in a...

    I'm sorry, but I just don't want to live in a world where everything is heated in the microwave for thirty seconds.
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