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  1. Replies
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    Four hundred thousand fucking people and nowhere...

    Four hundred thousand fucking people and nowhere to shit. That's pretty far out, dude.
  2. Replies
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    Woodstock was awesome. They didn't even have...

    Woodstock was awesome. They didn't even have outhouses. Where the hell did they shit?
  3. Replies
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    Hello and welcome to the internet. Is this your...

    Hello and welcome to the internet. Is this your first time?

    Yes and quite frankly, I am overimpressed.

    Well you should fit in rather well then, please take a seat.

    Honey? Is the koolaid...
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    I'm 68 years old. I hope I'm not too old to post.

    I'm 68 years old. I hope I'm not too old to post.
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    I like a good beer buzz early in the morning.

    I like a good beer buzz early in the morning.
  6. Replies
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    R5GoGClBvOg

    R5GoGClBvOg
  7. Replies
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    I don't mind y'all being happy but try not to...

    I don't mind y'all being happy but try not to have too much fun.
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    Perhaps happy new year day would be more...

    Perhaps happy new year day would be more appropriate, and you're on your own the rest of the year.
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    Happy new year 2022. Is it even possible to be...

    Happy new year 2022.

    Is it even possible to be happy for an entire year? I think it's a lot to ask. People are not supposed to be happy all the time.
  10. Replies
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    What in the helen reddy is going on up in here? ...

    What in the helen reddy is going on up in here?

    Ed? Are you still with us? Blink once for yes and twenty six times for no.
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    You got any bay rum? Last bottle of that I...

    You got any bay rum?

    Last bottle of that I drank nearly killed me.

    You drank a bottle of shaving lotion?

    Yeah, and I didn't even need a shave.

    You're a better man than I.
  12. Replies
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    Sorry, just trying to have a little fun. So what...

    Sorry, just trying to have a little fun. So what you guys wanna talk about? Tree leaves perhaps. Yes they are quite lovely. I just love tree leaves. Especially when they die.

    Dude you are sick.
    ...
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    Do the mop. Do the lurch. Do the yankee spankee.

    Do the mop. Do the lurch. Do the yankee spankee.
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    C'mon everybody, let's shake and bake.

    C'mon everybody, let's shake and bake.
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    It says in god we trust on our money. I suppose...

    It says in god we trust on our money. I suppose that's par for the course. Let's all trust in something that doesn't even exist, excellent idea.
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    Bob's yer uncle. God bless America.

    Bob's yer uncle.

    God bless America.
  17. Replies
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    We do not serve sides of beef here, sir, our...

    We do not serve sides of beef here, sir, our ovens are too small.

    Thanks mum but I think we have the problem resolved now. Thanks anyway and have a wonderful rest of the day.

    There is no rest...
  18. Replies
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    I will drink more beer than is necessary if...

    I will drink more beer than is necessary if necessary.

    Ok calm down, dude. Make it a side of hash-browns. And no butter on the toast.
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    Hi. I'm new here and would like to make a toast...

    Hi. I'm new here and would like to make a toast to bowlegged women.

    Welcome. Could I get two eggs over hard and a side of beef with that?
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    Ok number one, calm down. Number two, get a hold...

    Ok number one, calm down. Number two, get a hold of yourself. Number three, shake vigorously for at least 30 seconds. Number four, insert straw and suck.
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    326 users, Ed. What does it all mean?

    326 users, Ed. What does it all mean?
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    If I hadn't used my private parts for toys I'd be...

    If I hadn't used my private parts for toys I'd be a grandfather by now.
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    Jesus loves you. I don't believe we've ever...

    Jesus loves you.

    I don't believe we've ever met. He wasn't the guy in pink flip-flops at the concert was he?
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    You are the descendant of an alien being. I...

    You are the descendant of an alien being.

    I knew something smelled a little fishy.
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    Can we be realistic please? Ok you start and...

    Can we be realistic please?

    Ok you start and I'll try to keep up.
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