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Thread: Miscellany

  1. #2301
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    Bless me father for I have sinned, it's been 26 days since my last post.

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    Normal person: What time is it?

    Stock market person: A dollar forty nine.

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    What's become of us? I'm fairly confident that most chimps could walk a tightrope successfully on their first try.

  4. #2304
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    Without a net, of course. If you gave chimps a net, their ability would devolve. Mother nature seems to be somewhat of a bitch. When's the next train to Albuquerque, I gotta get outta here. Down the hall and take your third left. I said when, not where. Ahh, right, high noon sharp, please do not be late as the next flight isn't till saint Valentine's day.

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    My old age has made me skeptical. I now believe in nothing that's happened more than five minutes ago. A man of the times one might say.

  6. #2306
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    10% of Americans own 81% of all stock shares. I'm not surprised. I assume the other 90% live relatively normal lives.

  7. #2307
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    Quote Originally Posted by Atom View Post
    Zap, was I dreaming or did the stock market drop over 1100 points yesterday? Also, could you or someone tell me what a stock market point is?
    It did indeed.
    Actually, it was down over 1500 points at one point during the day, but rallied back a bit to close the day down "only" 1100.
    Friday, it dropped 666 points. No shit.

    And a point is equivalent to one US dollar, I believe.

    The Dow Jones and S&P are indexes of a group of stocks.
    The Dow is an index of 30 major companies and the S&P is an index of the top 500 companies.

    Some light reading...
    The 30 Dow Jones Stocks -- The Motley Fool
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    I wouldn't pay too much attention to the point values, though. It's the percentage moves that make or break you.
    The Dow dropping 1100 points from 10,000 is a much bigger story than dropping 1100 from 25,000.

    That 1100 drop was the largest drop in history, but if the Dow ever dropped 600 points from around 10,000, then that 600 point drop did more damage to your portfolio.
    Last edited by Zap; 08-02-2018 at 11:54 AM.
    #1 Pickup Line: Hey. Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

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    59DBC6A6-A9EB-43FC-8632-16B19FA70828.jpg

    I saw Ed down here, trying to get some action going.
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  13. #2310
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    I just learned from a game show that I'm a sexagenarian. Thank you, Jesus.

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    I've additionally learned that it would take 70 cups of coffee to kill a man. Funny You Should Ask is the TV game show. I've been watching it for a few months now and have concluded that it is a good one. It mixes humor with fact. This is a TV game show that I would highly recommend.

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    I broke my dry spell today and got me a handle of Seagrams 7, so, I expect y'all can expect some really witty posts for a while. lol

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    Skin color? Really? Have you people lost your fucking minds? Skin color don't amount to a hill of beans. What the fuck is the matter with y'all? Not enough tit sucking as a child, I suspect.

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    Hey, you guys wanna see a dumb motherfucking piece of garbage? Check out the current president of the Philippines, Rodrigo Roa Duterte. It don't get much dumber than that.

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    I've been thinking quite a while about this and I have to conclude at this point that I am god, and didn't even know it. I wish I had known this sooner.

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    Dear Ed, we miss you. Come back soon.

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    I will drink at this point more liquor than you have milk in your refrigerator. Also, god can kiss my ass. Thank you, Jesus.

  21. #2318
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    Is it possible to suck a hole? Just wondering.

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    There's only one thing that excites me anymore, hole sucking. It's great. Barbecue sauce helps.

  23. #2320
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    I am a person of renown, why can you people not accept as much?

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