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  1. #11641
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    I got club soda.

    I see, and what might I ask is the reference for such a label?

    You must belong to a club to drink it.

    I was afraid of that.

  2. #11642
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    No one has the luxury of choosing whether to be born or not. I think that is completely unfair and would like some kind of compensation from someone.

    God loves you.

    That's the same as saying the ashtray loves you. When are people going to realize that?

  3. #11643
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    God simply does not exist. It's just a fairy tale perpetrated by humans.

  4. #11644
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    Something MUST be responsible for everything and I'm calling it God, goddammit.

    That's fine. I think I seen God once when I unfolded my handkerchief.

  5. #11645
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    Heck that ain't nothin', I've got its image on an english muffin that's been in the deep-freeze for 6 years.

  6. #11646
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    Yes I know, I should've capitalized its. But why capitalize it if it doesn't even exist?

  7. #11647
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    All I know is this has been one hell of a crazy life, and I ain't ever married or had kids or nothin'.

  8. #11648
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    It's like I'm still in fucking high school or something and I'm 67 years old. WTF.

  9. #11649
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    I had a great post all typed up but the power went out for a second and I lost it. I reckon it was so off the wall that I can't even remember it, otherwise I could just post it again.

  10. #11650
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    I'm not sure life would be worth living without seedless grapes.

  11. #11651
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    A grape lover eh.

    Yes. They are sweet and delicious, and the skin gives you something to chew on.

  12. #11652
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    It's always nice to have something to chew on after the good part is gone. It makes one feel a bit like a ruminant.

  13. #11653
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    Seedless watermelon is rather nice as well, but you don't have the same chewing experience unless you start gnawing on the rind after the good part is gone.

  14. #11654
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    I think that I have tried to love one another, so will you please instruct your dog to release my pant leg? Thanks.

  15. #11655
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    I'm currently two beers past my daily limit. I hope that you are all happy.

    Oh I'm sure most of us are quite overjoyed. We're just happy to have something to read.

  16. #11656
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    So ... we are all having a good time, right?

    Right. I don't know when I personally have ever had a better time quite frankly.

  17. #11657
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    What height socks do you wear?

    Crew length.

    Ah yes, of course.

  18. #11658
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    Do you like green olives?

    Perhaps.

    That's either a yes or a no.

    I'm not sure.

    Listen, this is a serious question. Stop fucking around.

    They ain't got any colored toothpicks stickin' in 'em do they?

    Perhaps.

  19. #11659
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    Why must the subject matter be so trivial?

    It's more fun that way.

  20. #11660
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    And what the hell is that red stuff they stuff in 'em?

    Pimento.

    Ok well God bless everyone.

    Are you drunk?

    Yes. Is that some kind of a problem?

    Not necessarily.

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